Is the fear of divorce consuming your thoughts to the point that you can’t sleep, you’re distracted, you’re afraid of the unknown future, and you’re paralyzed with NOT knowing what to do to fix it? You’ve searched “how to save your marriage” or “how to get your spouse to fall back in love with you” and you’ve watched all the videos, but still don’t know what actions you must take or what order you should take them in to restore your connection. If that’s you, keep reading because I’m going to share with you insights into how to solve this problem.
Listen, you can’t turn back the clock and work on your marriage in the past. You can only start working on your marriage today, right now. What I’ve come to realize is that the only time you should stop trying to save your marriage is when the judge tells you that you’re divorced. Until then, there is always an opportunity for the door of his heart to open again. There is always the possibility that something you say will make him realize that divorce is not what his heart wants. After working with men for years, I know that most men want their wives to be happy, like you were in the beginning of your marriage. They are romantic and want you to feel in love with them again. They want to see you at you at your best, not your worst.
You’ll want to be ready for when the door to his heart opens, so prepare yourself. Don’t wait to work on yourself for when he’s ready to work on the marriage – that’s too late! Make the changes you know in your heart that you need to make in preparation for his return. Patiently wait for the door of his heart to open and so you can take immediate action.
If he’s your person and you can’t imagine waking up without him next to him, there’s no better time than the present to focus on improving yourself and your marriage skills. If you’re honest with yourself, there is something that you can do to improve yourself. I know that you’re overthinking, worrying, and afraid of the unknown future. I know that you’ve made mistakes, lost your temper, said hurtful things to your husband, and I know that you still love your husband and want to wake up next to him for the rest of your life.
So, why not take this time to do something productive and become the best version of you that is possible AND learn the skills that great marriages have: good communication, trust, autonomy, and intimacy. Why not turn this tragedy into victory?
If you get a second chance with your spouse and you’ve done nothing to work on yourself and your marriage skills, you’ll wish that you did something when you had the chance! Regret is a terrible thing to live with because you know that you could have, should have, done something different and you didn’t.
The last thing that your husband wants to do is make a mistake when he gives you a second chance. He doesn’t want to think that you’ve changed and come to realize that in fact, nothing has changed. Everyone is excited about their marriage getting a second chance for a few months, but if it’s all surface changes, your marriage will fall apart again, guaranteed.
The problem I see is women have an eye-opening moment when their person has pulled away from the marriage. Often times I’ll hear that she never saw it coming. There are some exceptions to this rule; yet, most men leave a lot of clues before they walk away. Unfortunately, women aren’t always able to pick up on the clues. That’s why they are in such shock when their husband has had enough!
Here’s what I see happening from a man’s point of view. He’s tried to make you happy and it never worked (or rarely worked). He always felt that nothing he did was good enough for you, you never seemed as happy as you were in the beginning of your marriage. He believes deep down that he’s not good enough and he’s tired of trying to prove to you that he loves you. It’s as simple as that!
Going to therapy to talk about how hopeless and depressed you feel is NOT going turn you into a happier person because we become what we spend time talking about. My solution to restoring your happiness and attracting your husband back to you is simple – become your higher self, show love for your husband, and learn how to attract him back to you using scientific and spiritual principles.
In my 6 Week group or private Marriage Mastery program, how to become your higher self is one of the main things that I help women work. We also work on understanding men, listening and communicating with men, and how to regain your confidence and feminine superpowers. DM me if you’re interested and we will have a quick chat to see if it’s a fit.